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Will he take advantage of me?

Updated on: 12 August,2022 06:06 AM IST  |  Mumbai
Dr Love | mailbag@mid-day.com

You have no obligations towards him and can’t be forced into doing anything you don’t want to. It is a position of strength, and you have nothing to lose

Will he take advantage of me?

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I am a 38-year old unmarried woman and haven’t been in a relationship since I was 28. I decided to stay unmarried because I didn’t meet anyone I wanted to be with and was happy just focusing on my career instead. I am very successful and own a house, along with enough savings to live a comfortable life. I recently met an older man who asked me out. I went on a few dates and am beginning to like him a lot. I know he likes me too, because he has made this quite obvious. A part of me is tempted to get into a relationship with him just to see what it is like, because it has been so long since I found someone even remotely interesting. On the other hand, I am nervous because I don’t know if this is just some way for him to be with a successful woman and take advantage of everything I have. I don’t think he is very well off, and don’t know if he wants to be with me just because I may be able to offer him access to a better life. What should I do?
You can start by getting to know him a little better first, before you assume he is trying to use you. There are no grounds for you to feel this way, and your hesitance may have more to do with the fact that you haven’t been in a relationship for a decade, and less to do with his intentions. Why assume the worst without trying to figure out what he wants, and how he really feels about you? What if you decide you don’t like him at all when you get to know him better? I suggest you meet him a few more times, and distance yourself if you start to feel uncomfortable. You have no obligations towards him and can’t be forced into doing anything you don’t want to. It is a position of strength, and you have nothing to lose.

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