But after you’ve preened around like a proud peacock, and attended a zillion felicitations and rallies where you will be praised to the skies for your greatness and leadership skills, we suggest you come back to ground zero. And, soon. Bombaywallahs have been a patient lot. But deep down they are plain fed up of false and empty promises, and the shoddy treatment they’ve been given for ages. As the elected representative of the constituency, there is a truckload of responsibility that lies on your shoulders.

First of all, we suggest you surround yourself with genuine experts across fields to help you deliver on your election promises. At this point, we have a heartfelt request—please stay away from chamchas and other fraudsters, especially the moneyed kinds, who will swarm around you but offer only lip service and ego massages. They are no good, and will use your company for photo ops, that they will misuse for their own devious agendas. Stay honest and true to the aam aadmi at all costs.

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Secondly, we hope you hit the ground running and access the immediate problem areas with your team of urban experts [avoid hiring retired idea-less babus looking to earn a quick buck, and for a return to the power circles]. The city is creaking at its joints, and fatigued by the pressures it has continuously withstood, thanks to ceaseless commercialisation, unplanned development and ill-timed schemes when the need of the hour is more of immediate action plans for pressing issues like the environment, climate change and improved public transport. These three factors directly impact the local, middle-class Bombaywallah in one way or the other but somehow seem to fall on deaf ears.

Sure, we are aware that you will be busy hopping between the corridors of the new Parliament building in New Delhi, and your home city and use lack of time as an excuse, but we expect you to take up your constituency’s welfare as soon as possible, to ensure funding for it can at least be initiated. Oh yes, and we have another request—please don’t use these much-needed, precious budgets for the renaming of streets, roads and railway stations. It does nothing to improve the everyday existence of the average citizen. Instead, smooth roads, improved train services, cleaner air to breathe, more green cover, advanced garbage disposal methods [this is one of our biggest worries], quicker completion of the many Metro lines, better facilities for commuters outside railway stations [have you ever tried to hail an auto or a BEST bus during peak hours?], better connectivity between locations along the central, western and harbour lines will be much more appreciated. Seated in your swank cars where you zip past from point to point, thanks to your lal-battis in full gusto, you can never imagine their hardships. And don’t even get us started on the rapid pace with which the city has lost its pavements and footpaths. Ground realities can be humbling dear neta, if you make an attempt, which we hope you will.

The cost of living is soaring at an unbelievable pace; buying or even renting an apartment in the city remains pipe dreams for crores of citizens—why not look into such issues and try to offer solutions for affordable housing?

Lastly, look at the other world cities for inspiration and adapt accordingly. Find suitable, pragmatic solutions that will work for the city. Don’t blindly copy ideas. One-size-fits-all doesn’t work, and certainly not for a city like ours. Oh, and flying away on the pretext of ‘study tours’ is hogwash. We all know what happens on such trips. Instead, invite indigenous ideas, encourage local voices and vision to re-look at how the island city and its suburbs can be in better health—from an infrastructure and environment standpoint. Let the experts do their job with sufficient freedom, and we will all reap the benefits of it.

On that expectant note, we shall sign off and leave you to get cracking. We will be keeping a close eye on you, to see how well you look after the city. You are our hope. Don’t let us down all over again.

Yours sincerely,

Lady Flora and Sir Pherozeshah M Mehta

mid-day’s Features Editor Fiona Fernandez relishes the city’s sights, sounds, smells and stones...wherever the ink and the inclination takes her. 
She tweets @bombayana. Send your feedback to mailbag@mid-day.com