A budget is a good thing, of course, because it supposedly allows us to see how our taxes are being used, gives us an idea of what the BMC thinks is important, and shows us a rose-tinted picture of what our future in this city is going to be like when those thousands of crores have been effectively deployed for our benefit. And yet, the more these zeroes go up, the less their benefits seem obvious.

This time around, there was a hike in the budget, presumably because a number of 'big-ticket' projects are to be announced. Big tickets are naturally another term for big payoffs, for those who happen to know the right people, but I say this only because not all such projects - the Monorail comes to mind - do what they are supposed to. Launching them is almost always more important than planning for them first. This year, it's the coastal road that's going to change our lives and make it possible for us to go from one end of the city to another without breaking into a sweat. Sure, there have been a lot of experts who believe it will solve nothing, and that the damage to our ecosystem will outweigh any perceived benefits, but what do experts know anyway? It is only our learned politicians who know best.

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Other projects that have caught their eyes this year include a cycle track, the development of a textile museum, and a mysterious footpath policy. There are also funds allocated for solid waste management, the restoration of heritage structures, the installation of 6,666 CCTV cameras in 381 civic school buildings and the usual desilting of nullahs and the Mithi river. Some funds have been allocated to beautify a couple of beaches, and Rs 3,323 crore has been set aside to develop "various public amenities," which means they can be used for anything and everything without criticism.

A budget provision of Rs 15.86 crore has been proposed for the production of cold mix that will fill the thousands of potholes we have long grown used to, and R50 crore will be used for LED street lights. It is important to keep in mind that these lights and that mysterious mix crop up like clockwork, because it's obvious that every preceding year's cold mix hasn't worked, or that the LED lights are dying faster than everyone thought they would. Rs 11,480.42 crore has also been allocated for the improvement of the city's infrastructure, which is a great way of saying it can be spent on anything under the sun.

The beauty of an annual budget for Bombay is that our city is vast enough to allow anything to slip under its radar, provided those in charge sweep things under the rug effectively enough. We are never given a say in what we want, which is why memorials, statues and new names for roads are thrust upon us. We don't get to point out that promises are never kept either, because accountability has long disappeared from the BMC's premises.

It may seem fairly obvious to anyone who has lived in Bombay long enough that our city has serious problems that can be tackled not with money but with officials simply doing the job they are paid to do. That so much is poured, literally, into our roads each year, ought to have initiated a criminal investigation years ago.

Unfortunately, the only thing these budgets do is remind us that the priorities of people in charge of managing Bombay will always be far removed from our own priorities. If it's better roads, cleaner hospitals, and access to public toilets that can change our lives, those are precisely the things we will have to wait the longest to get.

When he isn't ranting about all things Mumbai, Lindsay Pereira can be almost sweet. He tweets @lindsaypereira Send your feedback to mailbag@mid-day.com

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