Desire in Endless Nights

“You have no idea how much I was smiling,” Divgikar recalls the moment of his casting. A fan of the graphic novel, he remembers reading the book and wondering how Desire would be represented on screen. “When I read it back then, I was not aware of my gender identity, but was instinctively drawn to it,” he says adding, “All the other characters had a masculine or feminine undertone. This character was so fluid.”

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A sibling of Dream, Desire is an immortal in The Sandman chronicles. A personification of the emotion, it is portrayed as gender-amorphous throughout — a rare portrayal even in the USA. Amoral and often unpredictable, the character itself remains captivating. For Divgikar and many others, it was a rare moment of representation in literature and cinema. In a straight-laced Indian society, it is even more noticeable.

Desire in DC Comics’ The Sandman. Pics Courtesy/DC Comics

“Representation, basically inclusivity of a character without sensationalising, is lacking overall. We have been sensationalising trans-people for a very long time. Even today they will write a character for a trans-person which is then played by a man,” Divgikar frowns. He insists that the issue is not about an artist playing a character, but a gender being misrepresented. “It is very basic. You have to include trans-characters and actors. Write more stories about them, and be more mindful of it.”

The Audible show is a step in the right direction. The actor revealed that the show’s bosses only auditioned queer people for the role. The show runners, including Mona Shetty, did not spare the blushes when things went wrong either. “It was refreshing. We don’t want any special favours. We just want equal opportunity,” he says.

The actor admitted the character tapped into an instinctive nature that he was not aware of. “This is a part which is dichotomous and beautiful. It was a joyride,” he laughs describing Desire’s switch from being good to cruel and back.

Divgikar believes that such representation will allow younger trans-people to have hope. “Even with a privileged upbringing and a supportive family, it took me till my 30s to come out as a trans-person. If kids see themselves represented through Trinetra, Lakshmi, Rudrani and myself, there will be e comfort of not being alone.” As for the industry casting trans-people in the right roles, Divgikar thinks there is a long way to go. “For now, the audience are judging them on their gender. Right now, we don’t even have a place at the table.” Perhaps it is time to get a new table itself.